Has It Fallen Out of Orbit?

I am a habitual creature. I have to have a routine, or the world isn't right. I feel safe within the confines of a schedule, keeping me bound to reality and keeping my otherwise scattered mind on some sort of path. If my routine deviates in a small way, I find myself often frustrated and/or disoriented.

But today... the entire world around me seemed to have fallen out of its natural routine. As I type, my eyes are blank and blinking robotically. My typing is strangely rhythmic, and my voice, if spoken, is very gentle and empty. It is as if my spirit has gone into hiding deep within my body, and I'm running on autopilot. Sleep-deprivation? Possibly. But I do feel like a puppet on a string presently.

Today, I ventured out to Peachtree City with my sister and mother for a doctor's appointment. It was beautiful and sunny when we departed the house, but the sky kept deteriorating into darkness. My intuition kicked into gear, and my stomach began to do its "thunderstorm alert" pains.

My intuition... is amazingly accurate. Where I lack common sense, I make up for it in intuition. It's frightening.

A nurse told all of us patrons in the waiting room that a storm was approaching. I decided to go to the car to get the umbrella, as a precaution. I stood outside beside my car and felt the stillness in the air. The air was not as thick with humidity, and there was not a whisper of wind to be felt. Thunder was off in the distance. Something felt... weird... about this. I was quick to do my task and get back indoors. A short while later, a nasty storm poured from the sky. Trees blew sideways and lightning cracked the sky in two.

Nature's anger continued for at least thirty minutes before subsiding away. Ten minutes of very heavy silence fell upon everything. Then, sirens. Ambulances. Police cars. Sirens. It was eerie. Mom came out and we made our way to pick her up lunch. We passed another ambulance, siren blaring, along the way. We delivered her home and decided to run out for lunch as well. On the way home from this trip, we passed another ambulance and a car accident.

After lunch, we were instructed to go pick up Mom's medication. When we got to the traffic light right before the store, it was out. Everyone was driving madly, and I was horrified at the prospect of traversing this massive intersection. So I chose a different route.

Only that one traffic light was out.

We got home and I declared that I wouldn't go back out again. It was scary. Things weren't right. But I wound up going out again to pick up my sister's friend after his truck broke down. We ended up all staying out until 3:00 this morning. We drew chalk drawings in store parking lots, launched screeching balloons until we were too tired to chase them down, and caused chaos. But when the three of us returned home to hang out for a bit, my sister left me alone with her friend.

We sat in the driveway, drawing with chalk and coloring rocks. Talking about things I never knew he thought about. We watched two bats fly through the air, snacking on bugs. We did this for an hour, then I took him to a place I never had been to before to drop him off at another friend's house. Somehow, I made it back on my own. But as I got out of the car at the end of the driveway to pick up the paper...

It felt as if someone snuck up behind me, grabbed my shoulder, went for my throat, then prodded my shoulder-blade as if to tauntingly comfort me. I quickly got into the house and locked myself in.

Reflecting back on today has made me feel very eerie and out of place. As if I've fallen into a parallel universe, and I'm a parallel version of myself. Someone more calm and reserved. Maybe in a twisted sense, I have. Then again, I have moments where I like to think about these philosophical things that make people look at me like I'm crazy. Maybe it's possible. Nobody knows. But it makes me wonder.

I... am not myself right now. I don't feel like Dani. Maybe she'll come back upon the next awakening.